Let’s face it: stress is inevitable. Wherever you go, no matter what you do, stress will find a way to knock at your door and try to ruin your life. In fact, you can find stress almost everywhere: your job, your kids and family, your friendships and relationships, your bills and finances, and yes, even inside the bedroom.
Yes, sex.
Sex is one of the easiest, most convenient, and most effective way to get rid of stress.
It shouldn’t be that difficult, don’t you think? Unfortunately for women, it’s the other way around.
You may not admit it, but the bedroom could be a breeding ground for insecurity and anxiety. Worse, it goes beyond performance, because you have to deal with tons of issues, such as body image, ability to orgasm and make him orgasm in return, and STD concerns.
The good news is there are ways to help you combat stress inside the bedroom. Here are the 12 most effective ways to stop stressing over sex:
1. Fix The Bedroom. When was the last time your bedroom served its purpose? The bedroom is for sleeping and sex.
If you haven’t met these two conditions, then you may want to consider de-cluttering. You may not notice, but the extra pile of boxes and unfolded blankets could be the culprits.
Dedicate one day to cleaning the bedroom. Change the sheets, get rid of the clutter, transfer the non-bedroom necessities to the basement, fix the closet, buy that lamp for your bedside table, and make it a bedroom conducive for sex. Once your room is clean, your libido comes after.
2. Take Care Of Your Health. This is important. There is too much emphasis on proper diet and nutrition because it affects your overall function, including the way you move in bed.
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It may be easier to turn to comfort food and alcohol to ease your stress. Apparently, you are doing more harm than good to your body. Worse, it ruins your sex drive.
Therefore, make your health a top priority. Practice self-discipline and healthy stress management by not turning to food every time work and kids are getting in the way. Make healthy living choices starting with the food you eat. Your body will surely reward you after.
3. Work Out. Aside from eating healthy, working out is another way to help you get back on the sex track. You don’t have to enroll in the gym, although there’s nothing wrong if you prefer that way. Otherwise, you could start with brisk walking or running around the neighborhood. There are also tons of exercise videos on YouTube, which you could follow.
You could also enroll in classes to keep you motivated to work out. Try dance classes, Zumba, yoga, and Pilates, among others. If you have friends who work out on a regular basis, join them. It will help you lose weight too, which is a win-win situation.
4. Do Something That Makes You Feel Sexy. How many times have you felt you are not sexy enough in bed? According to experts, body image is not only a self-esteem issue, but also an issue inside the bedroom. In fact, 61 percent of women are too concerned about what their bodies look when they are naked.
If you are one of them, then don’t feel bad about yourself. All you have to do is to do something that makes you feel sexy. It may be taking yoga classes, having a night out with girlfriends, music, or getting a whole body massage. Once you start feeling sexy, your self-confidence follows both in and out of the bedroom.
5. It’s Not Always About Orgasm And Performance. Admit it. You worry too much about getting that big O and about your performance in bed.
No matter how many times you remind yourself that you are doing great, these issues can still ruin your mood.
Its okay, ladies.
Sex is not just about climaxing and doing outrageous things just to keep your man satisfied. Sex is also about hitting the right buttons, fulfilling your fantasies, finding pleasure, and most importantly, having a good time.
Relax. If you weren’t able to orgasm that night, there will always be other nights. After all, 75 percent of women cannot orgasm through penetrative sex. Just make sure you’ll talk to your man about this after, so he could also adjust his game plan.
6. Boost Your Libido. Here’s the truth: a low sex drive is not your fault. According to a 2008 survey, more women between the ages of 18 and 44 experience low libido at some point.
A variety of factors could be the culprit, including a lack of sleep, kids, work, use of birth control pills and even antidepressants.
However, don’t let these factors stop you from getting your groove in bed. There are many ways to boost your libido, such as eating healthy, working out with your man, getting enough sleep, kicking the pills, and adding intimacy in your list of to do’s. Your libido will surely come knocking at your door.
7. Talk To Your Man.When was the last time you talked to your man about your issues in bed?
Keeping the communication lines open is important, both in the relationship and inside the bedroom.
He needs to know what’s going on and how you are feeling so he would be able to adjust and introduce changes in the bedroom.
Therefore, sit down with your partner and evaluate your sex life together. Talk about the things that bother you, what you like and don’t like in bed, and come up with amicable solutions to make your sex life more pleasurable. This could also be a perfect opportunity to go out on a date and rekindle that fire.
8. Experiment. One of the issues women face these days is that sex may get dull and boring, especially if you are in a monogamous,long term relationship.
In case that happens, treat it as a challenge, not a hindrance for a better sex life.Therefore, look for ways to up your game inside the bedroom.
Consider sex toys if you don’t use them, role-playing, doing the deed somewhere outside the bedroom, and experimenting with different positions. If most of your sessions happen at night, try morning sex or an afternoon delight. The important thing is to do something about it when you feel sex becomes monotonous.
9. Fix Your Schedule. You know your body well, so you know when the peak of your stress level is.
If you are stressed towards the end of the day, consider changing your schedule to improve your mood.
Work on big projects and errands in the morning to help you rest the rest of the day. Don’t forget to give yourself five to 10 minute breaks in between to allow you to breathe.
Fixing your schedule could help you recharge and have more energy for your man. This also improves your mental function and helps you get in the mood for some action.
10. Seek Help When Necessary.Here’s another fact: various medical and mental health issues can affect your overall sexual function.
In case you can’t figure out what’s going on despite doing these things, maybe it’s time to schedule that trip to the doctor.
Having an annual checkup helps you identify anything unusual going on inside your body. This also rules out medical issues that can affect your sex life, such as a heart condition.
You will need address any health issue. If you are perfectly fine and yet your sex life still suffers, try to consult a sex therapist. She could help you come up with techniques to help you get your groove back in bed.
Don’t worry. It’s not always a sign of abnormality.
11. Understand Your Body. Who knows your body better than you, right? If you are stressed out and can’t even think of sex, then don’t force the issue just to keep your man satisfied.
If you feel something unusual is going on inside your body, then make that trip to the doctor.
If you think you need to consult a sex expert, then go ahead and do it.
One of the ways to help you stop stressing over sex is to understand how your body works. Listen to your body closely. Watch out for any red flags that could affect your overall sexual function. Hence, it is important to keep communication lines with your man open so he could help you address any issues you have.
12. Let It go. You might say this is easier said than done. Keep this in mind: you are in charge of your mental health.
You could also control your moods and your overall outlook. Therefore, start your day by looking at the brighter side of things, which includes wearing that big smile.
Start by allotting certain hours of your day to work and doing all the necessaries. As soon as you reach your time limit, say four in the afternoon, stop, let go of your work, and start saying no. You need to give yourself a break after a hard day. At the same time, you will need more energy for the night.
The bottom line is that stress is useless and not worth your time. Take note of these dozen tips and you will surely get your groove back in no time.