Good looks, nice boobs and shapely butts are some of the things men look for in a woman. Walk in a room full of men wearing a dress that accentuates your figure and the dudes will surely notice you. The brave ones will even follow you and ask for your number, so be prepared.
However, physical appearance is not the only thing that can turn a man’s head 360 degrees. Men may not admit it, but the “I’m sexy and I know it” attitude could also make their knees weak. In fact, men find it attractive if you also feel attractive and confident about yourself. You may not notice it, but self-confidence could translate to confidence in the bedroom, too.
Unfortunately, the media and the Hollywood celebrities have defined sexy and beautiful – and you’re not even close to their definition. No matter how many times you convince yourself that you have a smoking hot body or a pretty face, the media will always remind you that only Barbie is beautiful.
Don’t worry. Here are 10 simple strategies to help you boost your overall confidence, including confidence inside the bedroom.
1. Turn Down The Lights
One of the simplest steps to make you gain your confidence in the bedroom is by turning down the lights. This doesn’t mean you don’t like what you see. Admit it. Fluorescent light is something you want to get away from, especially when you are hiding your flaws to your man. Think about department store lights and you’ll get the picture here.
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On the contrary, a completely dark room may not be as exciting as you want it to be, either. Therefore, make sure that you choose the right lighting in the bedroom that will accentuate the good curves. Low wattage bulbs, lights that illuminate upward, lamps, dimmers and candles are some of your options. They provide just the right amount of light, while making you feel like a sex goddess.
2. Touch Yourself Regularly
How often do you touch yourself? If you touch yourself a few times every year, then you are in big trouble.
Masturbation will always be a part of human nature. Aside from getting that big O, sans your man, touching yourself regularly allows you to explore and understand your body parts. It also helps you get to know your body better, which leads to knowing what you want in bed and how things between the sheets should be.
Gone are the days when you will be persecuted for having some “alone” time, so go ahead and self-pleasure yourself regularly. You owe it to yourself, anyway.
3. Play Dress Up
No, this does not mean you should start dressing like a six-year old. Another way to give your sexual confidence a boost is to dress up in a sexy, but comfortable manner. Keep in mind that what you are wearing after you put on your lace underwear and before you take your clothes off is important.
Therefore, dress the part. You don’t need to show off some skin to make you feel sexy. In fact, your favorite white collared shirt and jeans is enough to make you feel hotter. It’s all about personal preference and what makes you feel sexy. As long as you flaunt the best parts of your body and be comfortable with what you are wearing, confidence will follow.
4. Schedule A Time Out
Aside from having an alone time in the bedroom doing you-know-what, how often do you spend time with yourself?
One of the reasons why many women don’t feel sexy enough is because they are tired and stressed all the time. If you are one of them, then you need to take a break. Now.
Women play different roles in our society. Although this is highly commendable, admit it. It can be exhausting; hence, it is important that you take a break often and think about yourself first. You don’t need a lavish vacation trip around the world to make you feel sexy again. Get a mani-pedi, schedule a one-hour whole body massage, get a wax, take yoga classes and even treat yourself to a bubble bath once the kids are sleeping. The more you take time for yourself, the better your sex drive and sexual confidence will be.
5. Invest In lingerie
You already know how important dressing up is. As soon as the lights go down and your dress is on the floor, you need something that will excite not just your man, but you as well. This is where lingerie comes in. Lingerie comes in different styles and trends that can work according to your body type and preferences.
A thong, babydoll set, corset, teddy, chemise orbustier are some of the types of lingerie you could choose from in the catalogues. The goal now is to find a style that you feel the sexiest wearing.
One additional tip: wear sexy lingerie most of the time, even if it’s only you who can see it. This increases your sexual thoughts and desires, which could make you feel more confident in bed. Who knows, the situation might call for it so at least, you are always prepared.
6. Go Naked
Confidence starts within you. The more you know, understand and accept your body, the more confident you will be even without showing too much skin. One way to do is to welcome nudity. When you are alone in your home, try walking around the house naked. If you have a covered backyard, take nudity outside. Walk around the house in your most confident form.
Every time you pass by a mirror, stop, look at yourself and be proud of your body. Recite an affirmation that will remind you that you are sexy and sensual woman, regardless of your waistline. It may look funny and awkward at first but eventually, you will learn to get past that and appreciate your body even more.
7. Go To The Gym
There is a reason why gyms and other recreational facilities that offer physical activities are popular.
It allows you to meet people with similar interests, promotes overall health and wellbeing, and it encourages a healthy lifestyle. Did you know that going to a gym could boost your body image, too?
According to research, exercise boosts one’s body image, even if the number you see on the scale doesn’t change.
Researchers from University of Florida conducted a study in 2009 and found out that people who exercise regularly feel good about themselves even if they don’t belong in the size two clothing category. The bottom line is, hit the gym. It makes you healthier, leaner, and fit and gives your confidence a boost.
8. Do Something Different
Let’s face it. Doing the same thing over and over is dull and boring. Don’t be surprised when you feel like dragging yourself everyday while trying to doing the same old things. You need adventure at some point in your life.
The solution is to step out of your comfort zone. There’s always something arousing about adding danger to the menu. If you are tired of the usual routine, add color to it by planning a daring activity you don’t normally do, such as surfing or rock climbing.
If you are not a sports junkie, then simple but different acts, such as wearing a slightly shorter skirt than your usual length or getting that rid of that hair bun in the office.
The important thing is you slowly break out of your comfort zone and try activities you don’t normally do. Surprisingly, it could affect your sexual confidence as well – in a good way, of course.
9. Get Your Partner Involved
Boosting your sexual confidence in bed is not only dependent on you. In fact, your partner could help a lot in giving your confidence a boost.
In What Way, You Might Ask.
If you feel confident and sexy with yourself, but your partner teases you or reminds you to work out, so you could have the same physique as Jennifer Aniston, you may find yourself in a rocky situation. Therefore, your man should be your number one cheerleader who will constantly remind you that you are beautiful both inside and out.
Talk about the things you like about each other. Share your preferences in bed and talk about the things that both turn you on. Once you get that assurance from your man, your confidence in bed will start knocking at your door.
10. Stop Comparing Yourself To Other Women
Above all these tips, it is important that you start appreciating and loving yourself and stop comparing yourself to other women. Fine, you can’t help but feel sorry for yourself after watching the Victoria’s Secret fashion show.
However, this doesn’t mean you should feel bad about it for the rest of your life. This is the perfect recipe, not just for your bedroom gloom, but also to rescue your declining sexual confidence.
Instead, look at yourself in front of the mirror and focus on your assets. Appreciate all of the aspects in your body that you find sexy.Remind yourself of your good qualities and don’t let negative thoughts ruin your mood. Every person is different, which means you have your own set of sexy tools in the bag. Capitalize on that.
Boosting your sexual confidence may not happen overnight. Still, following these tips will surely help a lot in getting your sexy back in the bedroom.